Tyler: Going Platinum

So has anyone else noticed how fucking wonderful it is outside? And inside? Everywhere in this city is perfect and I won't hear anything to the contrary.

I got Pokemon Platinum several hours ago and am two hours in on it. Don't judge.

So this little piece of writing is an exert from 'Chapter 10: In A Woman's Room I Hardly Know' from the book formerly known as DoubleBook. I really, really enjoy this bit because it breaks down the proverbial fourth wall (third book cover? is there an equivalent?) and shows the reader the true inner workings of my neurosis which has been going fucking APESHIT lately. I can't get out of my own head over analyzing every particular word said in every particular situation. Yes, that is my crazy. Everyone has a crazy and that is my most prominant one. So, yeah, enjoy this, motherfucker.





I started the car and turned on one of my top ten, all-time favorite songs, ‘No Lies, Just Love’ by Bright Eyes. It was simple and beautiful and had a tendency to drop panties which never hurt. After a few bars she came to realize what the song was, “Oh my god. This is Bright Eyes. I fucking love them.”
I decided not to point out that Bright Eyes would be more aptly described as a ‘him’ and not a ‘them’ though I realize that Conor Oberst does not perform all the instruments on his albums and no Bright Eyes’ album has ever been recorded without Mike Mogus, for all intensive purposes the band is basically one man. I did not bring this up because I would then have sounded like a pretentious idiot. No, I held my tongue but I am mentioning this to you for several reasons. It is possible that I would rather be judged from a distance than from someone sitting next to me in a car. Hopefully, you are not reading this whilst sitting next to me somewhere. It is also possible that I’ve told you and not Beth as a way to showcase the inner workings of my mind or my neurosis, if you will. It could be that I’ve held on to that moment in my head until the perfect time of release, setting me free from all burdens that came with that point in time with Beth in my car. At the same time, I could be executing simple character development through an event that may or may not have happened to either show the ignorance of Beth or my own elitist ideals. At any rate, it was probably best that I didn’t mention these things to her because they would have bored the fuck out of her most likely in the same way I have just bored the fuck out of you. Moving on.