Good evening America. I'm almost done with a short story, it's fairly long and I will post it upon it's completion but, tonight, that is not why I write. There are larger issues tonight. Much larger.
It has come to my attention that the following people have something in common: Madonna, Hugh Jackman, Cher, Tyra Banks, Britney Spears, David Beckham, Brad Pitt. Thinking? Got it? No, I don't think you do.
They are all straight Gay Icons and dammit, I want to be one, too. I mean, how fucking great would that be. It'd be like having instant street cred in at least one district in every city. Can you imagine? I mean, can you imagine walking down a street and just being, you know, a fucking god? "Oh My Fucking Shit! Ahh, I loved you in that band from the 80's/ Rocky Horror/ Teen Witch!!! You just have to come to this lingerie party with my vulnerable hot female friends/ rave/ linger-rave!" Run that through your mindgrapes right quick. Awesome, right? What a great night that would be.
And then, if I became a really good gay icon I think I'd start getting things named after me like mixed berry infused shots with whipped cream on top. Or maybe a hotdog named after me, you know, for the super-subtle innuendo...because it's like a penis. Once I had things named after me I'd be a permanent icon. Maybe I could get a street named after me in some gay mecca like Fidel Castro did. Genius move.
So I need to get the ball(s) rolling on this. I'm going to need some suggestions and probably a little help. Please, help me out America. Let's do this fucking thing.
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2 comments:
unlikely
Castro Street was not named after Fidel Castro lol.
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